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Gravity’s Bitch….again

I have finally been de-feeted

Mar 25th, 2010
by gazelle.
8 comments

Well, not actually, although who knows what the podiatrist will recommend. I am about ready to do a self-amputation, though. (Honestly, it was bad enough last week that I went to a shoe store that sells danskos & crocs to see if there was a shoe that would fit on my foot. Fortunately for me, there wasn’t.)

My foot has not recovered. In fact, the foot is in a pretty bad way. I’m pretty sure that at any second, an alien is going to burst forth from the side of my foot and start trying to hunt down Sigourney Weaver.

dramatic recreation of my foot

Sorry about that photo. But really – you’re lucky I didn’t show you a photo of my ACTUAL foot. It’s much worse. Everyone who’s seen it in the past weeks, INCLUDING A RUNNING SHOE SALESMAN, has said, and I quote, “erghhhhh…..”

So – what does that mean?

Well, it means that I’ve been compensating for the foot pain by walking and running funny and have also managed to turn myself into a hunchback.

dramatic recreation of what I look like right now. seriously.

I haven’t run since last Tuesday, when I went through one of the most painful 4.5 miles of my running career. I was supposed to run with the Ambitious One this Tuesday, but Monday night, when I had to remove my shoe to DRIVE due to the pain, I was forced to call and cancel on her (and leave what was apparently a super pathetically sad voicemail in the process).

Tuesday, I woke up with serious back agony and called in to work. I spent the day moping and whinging.

Wednesday, I made my kick-ass neighbors drink all the wine in North Portland with me and whinged some more.

Today, I whinged at the Ambitious One on a coffee date and Junk Miles on a cocktail date.

Of course, the architect has been blessed with near constant whinging all week (not to mention the grumpiest wife this side of the Mississippi).

I have a podiatrist appointment for next Friday (April 2) to see what’s wrong with my foot. Unless a miracle happens and the alien comes out leaving my foot 100% normal, I will not be running until at least April 3.

April 3 is almost exactly 1 month before the marathon. At this point, my longest run, which was almost three weeks ago, has been 14 miles.

I can transfer my marathon registration to the half marathon without penalty up until March 31. Which is what I am likely going to do.

I am hoping that I will be able to run the three races that I have on my schedule in the next five weeks, but I doubt I’ll be RACING any of them. (And by racing, I of course mean trying to PR, not trying to win.)

So, basically what I’m trying to say is that I’m a marathon drop-out.

And I feel like a giant loser/quitter. Monday evening I told the architect that I was more concerned about looking like a loser than permanently hurting my foot. He asked me at what point during my weekend in Seattle had I turned into a man. Which may have been an insult to men everywhere. I know that this is the right decision, because feet are so important to many of my favorite things: running, swimming, yoga, wearing super cute shoes (which obviously I cannot do right now, and that is almost as bad as not being able to run). I know that very few of you are thinking right now, “that gazelle is such a loser for not being able to run through the pain of an alien gestating inside her foot.” I just hate being a quitter. Because quitters never win, right?

ACK!

Of course, it might be hard to win without my right foot, too.

So – the plan is to step up the swimming & yoga during the next few weeks. I briefly thought about becoming a barefoot runner since my foot doesn’t hurt when there aren’t shoes involved, but then I remembered that barefoot running squicks me out, and decided against that path.

I am also going to try some biking, and if my foot feels okay, I will put on some shoes and lift weights. After 4/2, when the podiatrist magically cures my foot, I will start running again. And there will be great rejoicing! If the podiatrist doesn’t magically cure my foot, I might have some race bibs to get rid of.

And possibly a foot.

For Sale! Half Off!

Gravity – it’s not just a good idea, it’s the law!

Nov 24th, 2009
by gazelle.
6 comments

This morning, the architect was driving me to work (as he does about once a week – and if I’m good, he’ll pick me up, too!) and we were having a discussion about my grace.

He said that he thought I was much less clumsy now than when we’d first met, and theorized (hypothesized?) that it was due to the double whammy of losing weight (less of me to run into stuff) and becoming more athletic (running + yoga = grace, relatively speaking).

I’m not sure why I thought this conversation was a good idea. Obviously that is how things get jinxed. After arriving at work, I was attempting to hit one of the ‘auto-open’ buttons for a door that was rapidly closing on the woman in front of me. I missed.

I missed because the toe of my boot caught on a rug. I tripped, and that door? The one that was rapidly closing? Was closed when my head got there.

I am so graceful. Graceful like a gazelle. ON CRACK!

Are you enjoying my hiatus?

Sep 9th, 2009
by gazelle.
21 comments

So, less than 24 hours after I warned you about light posting, here I am! For two reasons.

1. To update you in the continuing saga of how I am attempting to humiliate myself in front of every single person in Portland.

2. To ask a favor.

The Humiliation of Amy

This morning, I rode my bike to work. It was really scary. I did not use my blinky tail light (or, as I affectionately refer to it, my “butt light”), but that’s okay, because it wasn’t dark.

I got to work, and was locking up my bike. I pulled my U-Lock out of my bag, and as that happened, I flung my thong at the guy on the next rack. They hit him. He didn’t look particularly excited to have a woman throwing panties at him, so I’m guessing he’s never been in an aspiring rock band. I had to walk over about 5 feet (I am a champion panty flinger, people) and pick them up off the ground. It takes a lot to get me to blush, but that did it.

The favor

Because I am kind enough to share with you my humilations, I think you owe me something. Well, not really, but I need some suggestions. I read my way through all of the book suggestions I got from you guys last fall, and my book queue at the library is currently almost empty (I do have “Dead Until Dark” on hold, but as I am #47 of 135 on 35 copies, I am not holding my breath), and I need some books! Especially now that I am doing more public transportation commuting. And, since I’ve only read 29 new books this year (Mr. Pi – I finally finished Cryptonomicon, and it was very, very good – you were right), I need to get on top of the reading if I’m going to make my goal of 52!

So – please, kind people, tell me what to read. And then come be my friend on Good Reads!

Lord! What fools these mortals be.

Sep 3rd, 2009
by gazelle.
5 comments

Today is the second day in a row that I’ve biked to work. I did join the Bike-to-work challenge, with the intent of biking twice a week. BUT – I’m thinking I can do 3-4 days (which is all of them)/ week. I am a bit concerned about how I’ll work that out with my Monday swim lessons & Tuesday run, but it should all come together, right?

Anyways – last night after work, I headed out (on my bike) to Widmer Bros. They had a new bike corral & were celebrating it with a Bikes & Brews event. The mayor led a ride from city hall, and everyone who showed up with a helmet got a free raffle ticket – they gave away some pretty cool stuff. I was really hoping to win a bike bell (or the new, very pretty bike), but alas! Out of the 150-ish tickets issued, and the millions of prizes, I won nothing!

I did, however, manage to once more act like an ass in front of the mayor. The first time, I was super bitchy to him, because I thought he was some pushy salesperson in a bike shop trying to get me to buy an expensive bike. It was only two minutes after I walked out of the store that I realized it was the mayor, and he was trying to be funny or something.

So, last night, I was sitting at a table, waiting for the raffle, and drinking a beer. At my table was the mayor, some guy from Widmer (who, thanks be to all that’s holy, wasn’t an actual Widmer brother – because Rob was there), the organizer of sunday parkways, and a couple of other people. We were having an animated conversation about Sunday parkways (which I am in favor of), and I, gesticulating wildly, knocked over my beer. And spilled it on the Widmer employee. The mayor did not look impressed, and that was pretty much the end of my participation in the conversation.

Hi, my name is Amy, and I like to embarrass myself in public – particularly if there’s someone prominent there. At least it wasn’t (I’m pretty sure) captured on film.

ANYWAYS – the event was great. I got a free bike bottle, and the beers were $3, and then I had some schnitzel!

“Realizations” or “How Amy is a Dumbass” or “Maybe the PT Knows Best”

Aug 19th, 2009
by gazelle.
12 comments

So, I was going back through my training records (because I keep them. meticulously), and realized that every time I’ve dealt with any kind of leg injury in the past year, it’s always, always been when I start running four days a week. The first week of August, I ran Tuesday, Thursday, Friday & Sunday. It was a great week. A 32 mile week. I felt so awesome & strong. And then I did my track work the very next Tuesday & pulled a muscle.

My PT told me (repeatedly is probably  not emphasizing things too much) that I shouldn’t run more than 3 times a week – at least not if I wanted to have a long running career.

And, every time I run more than 3 times/week, I get injured.

But, see….the deal is that I don’t care that there are a ton of people that run faster than me. That doesn’t bother me. I am just excited about how much faster I am now than three years ago. BUT, I am jealous of the people who can run more than me. I don’t necessarily want to run 50+ mile weeks, but I would like to run 5 days/week.

Apparently, at this point in time, anyways, that is not a realistic goal. I need to remember that I run for me, and if I want to keep running for me, I need to run smart.

So – I am currently revising my running schedule for the next 45 (eek!) days leading up to the marathon. I am going to run smart and strong.

After the marathon, I am taking six months to build up a good, strong base. In that six months, I am going to concentrate on my swimming & biking, and running will be for maintenance only.

I probably won’t hit 1,000 miles this year, but that’s okay – because if I run SMART, that means that I can try for 1000 miles next year, or the year after, and every year after that until I’m dead, right?

I haven’t finalized my plans post marathon (and of course everything is subject to change), but I really want to work on strength training, weight loss, and (as mentioned) swim & bike. Because I really want to do more tri’s next year. Maybe even a 70.3. Maybe. And I don’t want to be plagued with injury throughout that training.

In GOOD news, my pulled muscle is no longer really bothering me, although it starts to twinge if I sit too long (so I’ve been trying to get up & move around more than usual). I had GREAT swimming lessons with The Ambitious One on Monday. She’s a great coach, and I’m already feeling more confident & stronger in the water.  Pretty soon, I’m going to learn another stroke! And then I’ll be all fancy!

Last night, I went for a bike ride with the architect. We did about 11.5 miles at an average 12 mph pace (i.e. slowish, even for me, and practically standing still for the architect). I wore my bike shoes for the first time in a LONG time – I had a few accidents in them last year – not being able to get my feet unclipped in time – and am afraid of them. BUT, with a seat adjustment, and the shoes, and pedaling in the largest front chainring, I felt that I was biking much more efficiently.

I feel pretty good about having such great swim & bike resources. The running (when I’m not being stupid) is something I feel comfortable/confident about already, but the swimming & biking are challenging – although becoming less so.

And, in keeping with the “Amy is a Dumbass” theme, last week, I bought a mandolin slicer. I have wanted one for a long time, because the slicing! Is fancy! and mine also juliennes! The architect made some funny jokes about how many times I would use the slicer before slicing myself.

Answer: twice. Ladyfingers anyone?

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