Gazelles On Crack

it’s hard to be graceful after six martinis

Contact Me!

Send all correspondence to gazellesoncrack (at) gmail (dot) com.

I’m pretty good at replying to comments & emails, although I am occasionally very slow. Of course, if you’re a moron, I will probably mock you publicly.

If you want to buy me presents, I suggest looking here. I will be enormously grateful, of course. I would say really nice things about you to whomever you wished. You need a good reference for a new job? Send me a gift, and I will tell anyone you want what a great employee you are. I am totally bribable that way.

Please don’t be mean to me. Not that you’ll hurt my feelings too much, I just think that it’s so sad when strangers are mean to other strangers because they don’t like their blogs, when really, you could just go away & not think about me any more. Of course, if you are mean to me, then don’t be surprised if I am not nice to you, either.

And, several last words of advice. Eat some cheese. Drink some gin. Be happy. Make a comment. Pimp me out to all your friends. Adopt a kitten. Introduce folk dancing. ha ha ha…Robin Hood…really – that’s comedy right there. (are you laughing with me, or just quietly backing away from your computer?)