Gazelles On Crack

1. I think I won’t die. (Well, eventually, I will likely die - just not anytime today. Probably.) However, I am still lacking a lot of focus, so today, I just have bullet points.
2. Yesterday afternoon I started feeling better - able to keep the food where it belongs.
3. I made African Chicken Peanut Soup for dinner last night, and it was amazing - I was able to eat an entire bowl of soup without once even contemplating puking. So - definite progress.
4. My friend Kim brought me over a bunch of pumpkins (two large & two smallish), so more pumpkin butter is in the making. Also other pumpkin-y things.
5. I really really need a chest freezer. My little freezer is always so full.
6. I need to go out today & get some groceries and some inserts for my running shoes.
7. I think I’m going to take today off (4th day in a row - boo) and get back into some exercise tomorrow with some light elliptical. Run on Wednesday & Friday & Sunday.
8. There is something in my diet that is bad. I’m not sure what it is, and I think I need to start tracking my food - but every few meals, I get uncomfortably full & bloated feeling, even when I haven’t eaten much. This morning for breakfast, I had coffee with soy creamer, one slice of 12-grain bread (from the store), an egg & some cheese (the bread, egg & cheese were a delicious little sandwich). Is it the bread? the cheese? I have some issues with dairy. BUT, not usually cheese (lately). Should I give up the most delicious food ever created (cheese, in all forms) or should I cut back on my wheat? Is it the egg? I can probably give up eggs. (Bread & cheese, along with tomatoes are the most perfect foods. Everything else is just a vehicle for the enjoyment of bread & cheese.)
9. I am lactose intolerant - although I can usually do cheese lately. However, there was a time when even cheese was bad - hence my cheese worry with this morning’s breakfast. In related news, today I won something. My first win for anything blog-related. Free ice cream.  I would’ve turned it down, but they do make frozen fruit bars with very little dairy. Also, I love ice cream, even if it hates me. And I love Blue Bunny. Also, I was pretty sure the architect would be angry if I’d turned down free ice cream.)
10. Why did I get the flu? I just had a flu shot like three weeks ago. That was a total waste of money (okay, fine, it was a free shot, but still). [Also, I realize that influenza does not often come with vomiting, but it CAN! And I had the symptoms: fever, severe body aches & muscle pain, headache as well as general malaise. I did not get the respiratory symptoms, which probably means I didn't actually have influenza, but STILL!]
11. I really like the phrase “general malaise.” It sounds so genteel.
12. I really really wish I had someone to come clean my house for me. I like having a clean house - I just can’t really be bothered.
13. I have spent all morning researching cookie recipes. I am totally going to kick the holiday bake-off’s ass. Or something.
14. I am not going to my lady appointment today. Hair removal & the last vestiges of the flu do not go together.
15. Week One of not being on a diet seemed to go pretty well. I paid a lot of attention to hunger & full signals, and almost acted accordingly. I was really good about not over-stuffing myself. I felt that I made good choices. I brought my lunch to work. I brought snacks. I went to yoga on Monday, ran on Tuesday, Shredded on Wednesday, Crazy Weights on Thursday. I also got sick & vomited for 24 hours. The result? I gained 2.6 lbs. Seriously. What the hell happened? How do you eat right, exercise, throw up everything for a day & still gain 2.6 pounds? I am now at my highest weight in well over a year. I am 10 pounds over my lowest weight (since high school). This is complete insanity! ACK!!!!  I’m not quite sure I understand. It’s going to be hard to stay off the scale until next Monday.  I have gained 5.6 lbs in the last 2 weeks, and I’m not quite sure why. If I’m not careful, I’m going to have to go buy new pants again (since I got rid of everything over a size 6 last year). And that is unacceptable.  No plan yet….but I’m working on it.

I almost forgot! I have now participated in a listless Monday!  WOO!

So - I am beginning to think that perhaps my extreme inability to move on Friday was only partially due to the Thursday weights class & may also have been partially due to the fact that I am sick.

By Friday evening, I was a wreck. The architect & I were meeting friends out, and honestly, if it had been just about anyone else, I would’ve cancelled. BUT, these were people who I haven’t seen since August, and I am inordinately fond of them (well, I don’t know her QUITE as well as I know him, but I do really like her). So, we went out & had beers. At one point, as I’d started my first beer, but before there was food, I thought I might pass out. I ate a little, and started to feel a bit better, but I just thought that the muscle soreness was just messing with me (seriously - I have never been that sore before, not even when I went on my first hike with the architect 6 years & 60 lbs ago, and that was bad).

After I had to reject the idea of me playing pool, we went to our friend’s place where he made me many vodka drinks & I got to sit in the chair in front of the heating vent. A good time was had by all.

The next morning I woke up still very very sore. And headachey. And confused - I hadn’t had THAT much vodka. We took two of the cats to the vet and spent more money on them than they probably deserve (Darwin has to be sedated for exams & rabies shots).

The architect & I went to Home Depot as we do most weekends, and then went out to lunch. I felt a little queasy, but was still blaming it on the vodka. Then, after lunch, the vomiting started. (Sorry other people in the bathroom at the restaurant!)

I insisted that we could still go to Target, since we were right there, but that probably marks the fastest (and cheapest) trip to Target ever (although I did get a 2nd crockpot).

The rest of the afternoon was spent on the sofa watching Buffy & playing RPGs. And occasionally deciding that I felt well enough to try to eat (I was ravenous) and then hanging out in the bathroom.

It has now been 14 hours since I’ve last thrown up. I ate some bread & jam for breakfast, and it’s staying down, although it’s not happy about it. I think the worst feeling in the world is nausea, and I have now been nauseous for well over 24 hours.

With fever & chills, that makes life a barrel of laughs.

Do you know what we don’t have? Soup. Saltines. Ginger Ale. I would really like some soup & saltines & ginger ale. I am really hungry. The last thing I ate that stayed put (before my bread this morning) was a doughnut, and that’s just not very nutritionally sound.

My one consolation is that I don’t believe I’m quite as much of a wuss as I was thinking. I don’t think that it was the weight lifting that made me feel so sore (although I’m sure it didn’t help), but rather the onset of the plague.

I would like to apologize to the Ambitious One & Junk Miles for ditching them last night, and for skipping the run this morning. And to anyone I may have come into contact with & infected in the last couple of days. And again, anyone who was in the bathroom at BJs yesterday at about 1 PM.

Provided I survive this sick (gotta love losing an entire weekend to illness), I will be running again Tuesday - 5:30ish, Lincoln High track. We have speedwork planned, but depending on how I’m doing, I may just run laps.

And, if you’re in the neighborhood & you have some nice, non-spicy soup, feel free to stop by. I promise not to puke on you.

The other day, JeepGirl17 gave me an award:

As she says,

The idea behind the “Proximity” award is that there are some blogs out there that make you feel closer to somebody out there. You may never meet this person in real life. It may a person whom you wouldn’t have become friends with in the outside world. It may be a person you have very little in common with. 

But this person is somebody who you check in on every day. Somebody you become interested in, somebody you wonder about if they haven’t posted in a while. Somebody who, in weird way, you start to consider your friend. 

I’m passing it along to:

ABDPBT: Anna is hilarious - even her stories involving her toddler are funny (and i’m not a big toddler fan). Also, you have to check out the continuing saga of Tonya. Really - go. 

Republic of Dogs: I love the crazies (and I mean that in the nicest possible way) on this site. Everything you could ever want is hear - politics, food, wacky stories about dealing with the CDC, stories about dating Jewish doctors….and the discussions generated are almost as good as the posts themselves.

In Good Taste: This is one of my go-to food porn sites. The food photography is good, and I have gotten so many good ideas here. She does so much with seasonal foods, and that makes me happy. Yum.

For a more comprehensive list of all the bloggers I love, check out my rotating blogroll on the right. You all rock.

So, I’m not sure what happened in my weights class yesterday. I didn’t get all ambitious and grab the 15 lb dumbbells. I was pretty sure today was going to be bad when I was already having trouble moving last night.

And today? Is bad. We have passed the “good pain” place and have gone straight into “do I really need to put deodorant on? I don’t think my arms will go up high enough.”

I could put my hair up this morning, and it was all I could do to actually brush it. I never wear my hair down (and then, of course, I spilled tzatziki sauce in my hair - so that was hot).

It’s not just my upper body, either. My thighs hurt. Bad. 

I did not run this morning. Maybe it was the 48 pushups. Or the flies. Or the sqauts & hammer curls. Or the fact that I am apparently much wussier than I thought. 

I kind of want to go home, sit on my sofa, and have people bring me martinis. And ibuprofen. And maybe a heating pad.

So, this morning, for the first time in a LONG time, I drug myself out of bed for the 6AM Crazy Weights™. I won’t lie, people, not only is it hard to get up & out of the house by 5:25, that class kicked my ass this morning.

And, apparently before I’ve had my morning caffeine, I feel a little bit….judgy.

Judgy of the girls behind me who, when told to grab their heavy handweights, giggled and got their 4-pound weights.

Judgy of the girl in front of me whose butt crack was showing the ENTIRE class. I’m not a prude, and I am a cracky gazelle, but I am a believer in keeping your crack to yourself. 

Mostly, I was judgy of the giggle twins who had a big discussion about how they shouldn’t be lifting more than 5 lbs, because they didn’t want to ‘bulk up.’ Seriously. I kinda wanted to give them a lecture, but it seemed inappropriate. And early. And also, the instructor (who only VERY occasionally uses 5-lb weights when she’s taught 3 classes in a row) is not bulky; she is incredibly toned (think MizFit arms, people), and is probably the best testament to how using heavier weights just makes you hot.

It’s not like I had anything heavier than 10 going on - and by the end of the workout, I was mostly using the 7.5’s, but I think the whole point of getting up at 6 AM is to actually strength train. But it’s possible I’m just crabby that early & should not let other people’s misconceptions & lack of motivation affect me in any way.

So - GONE!  No more judginess. Those girls were silly, but it in no way impacts me. (See how easy that was Prop H8 Supporters!)

I feel so good now, except for the part where I’m not certain if I’ll be able to lift my arms above my head tomorrow. It’s hard to get out of bed for this, but I think I just need to remind myself how awesome I feel all day Thursday when I do. Maybe I need a motivational poster above my bed or something…..hmmm….

Or maybe this is a little more motivational. Although probably a lot less likely. BUT, if Johnny Depp is going to show up, I don’t want him to see arm flab, right?  Anyone with me here?