Gazelles On Crack

I don’t have a picture today. When I first got pregnant, I envisioned that I would have weekly photos to document my body’s changes and that it would be super cute.

It turns out that I’m not that person. I forget. Or don’t bother. This week it was a “don’t bother” situation. I haven’t had real clothes on since about noon on Monday, and was not about to post a picture of myself in my pj’s with matted hair on my blog. (Point of clarity – my hair is matted, my pj’s don’t have hair.) Once that picture exists on the internet, there’s no going back.

So – bumpday news….

Every week closer starts to feel a bit more terrifying. I am 6.4 months pregnant. 70% done. There are 12 weeks left. Twelve weeks is the amount of time it takes to complete a short marathon training program (the training program is short, not the marathon, obvs…marathons are always the same length).

So – since I can’t show you how bumpy I am (pretty much the same as last week, though), I’ll give you some other updates:

Baby size: 14.8 inches-ish; 2.5 lbs; about the size of a Chinese cabbage (I know, right?)

I’m feeling: not too bad; just a little unwieldy. I have trouble sleeping – between waking up to pee 2-3 times per night (only once last night! YAY!) and waking up 2-3 times to roll over (yes, I have to wake up to do it; I can no longer roll over in my sleep), I haven’t had an uninterrupted night of sleep since mid-July. I also know that it will be a loooong time before I can claim that again.

I get occasional Braxton Hicks contractions, especially if I don’t stay extra hydrated. I had some very exciting stress-related false-labor contractions on Monday & Tuesday, but nothing since.

Physical changes: My belly button is still an innie, but I don’t know how much longer that will last. No new stretch marks (just rocking the ones I had from when I got fat ages ago). My linea nigra is getting pretty dark. Skin = good. Hair = shiny & thick (and lackluster, honestly). Weight = we’re not talking about that. I had physical therapy on Monday to work on my pelvic issues and that is much better. I am going to swim tonight & resume walks tomorrow (if I feel okay).

Baby stuff: Alvie Bean has been the most active fetus in the world the last couple of days. I believe that’s also stress related. Monday afternoon, he was so active that I felt I was watching some kind of tennis match where he was the only player. There’d be a protrusion & kick on the right side of my belly, and a few seconds later, the same on my left. And back & forth. I’m not sure who won, but I know it wasn’t me!

Body Image: When I can forget about my weight, I actually quite enjoy my body now. I’m strong and leanish where it counts (arms & legs) and have this big, round, smooth belly. Jen said the other day that a smooth, round pregnant belly was just as awesome-looking as washboard abs, and I think she’s right.  I like wearing tighter clothes now that it’s all smoothed out.

Food stuff: No real cravings or aversions anymore. I couldn’t eat a raw cucumber to save my life (well, maybe to save my life), but that’s the only aversion leftover from my 1st trimester nausea. I like food, and am glad that my taste for fruit came back.

I lied a little – my big craving? Beer. I just want to have a giant beer.

Although I am actually having a fairly specific craving: Amnesia’s Desolation IPA. I would like 2, please. (ha ha ha – that would probably knock me out. I think the ABV is something like 235%.)

Prep Work (Things to do between now & Alvie Bean Day)

January: Find a pediatrician, lock down a daycare, recycle all the old electronics in the office, get the carpet cleaning appointment made, find a maid service for quarterly deep cleans, finalize shower list for shower giver!

February: Attend childbirth & breastfeeding classes, take babymoon, make sure all essentials are purchased (diapers and carseat at this point!), pack hospital bag

March: Finish getting less essential essentials (rocking chair, crib, changing table, other random stuff), make a plan for freezer meals, finish getting nursery ready, sign up for FMLA

This week has been one of the hardest weeks I’ve ever had to deal with, but I’m hopeful that it is getting better at this point. I don’t really want to get into a lot of details here, but there was a major medical crisis with my father back in South Dakota. Monday & Tuesday were the scariest days. I felt bad not being there for my mom & sister. However, being 28 weeks pregnant meant I had to also take care of myself first. At this point, I think we’ve made it past the first big hurdle safely and are gearing up for the rest of the hurdle-jumping journey.

I would, however, appreciate it if you would send best wishes, healing energy, prayers, good juju, or whatever you can to my dad and his health. He is one of the two most important men in my life, and besides that is completely awesome in so many ways. I know that he will also be grateful for any and all positive healing energy sent his way.

AND…moving on…

Perhaps, if I’m feeling sassy tonight, I’ll have the Ambitious One take a pic of me in my maternity suit, photoshop the crap out of it, and then post it for all to see how I rock my tankini.