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stress

Stress Management

Feb 3rd, 2012
by gazelle.
6 comments

I’ve been doing a lot of navel gazing lately. It’s easy, because my navel is very, very shallow (I’m on belly button pop-out watch!).

I know I’ve talked before about how I prefer to operate at the busiest possible level pre-nervous breakdown. My former therapist said that I seemed to function best when going at an 8-9 out of 10 of busy. I felt that was an approbation. I’m not sure it was.

[Side note - I should've known that it wasn't normal, but my favorite quote in high school was:

My candle burns at both ends; it will not last the night; but ah, my foes, and oh, my friends - it gives a lovely light!
Edna St. Vincent Millay]

The problem with operating on all cylinders at all times, burning the candle at both ends, etc. is that it doesn’t take much to push me from optimum operating speed to nervous breakdown-adjacent.

One of my goals for 2012 (not an official goal, or anything) is to learn to operate at a lower level so that when life throws a wrench at my head (as opposed to just in my plans), I can continue to function.

So – how do I stay productive without 15 million things to do? Since June of 2009, I’ve been going to grad school, working a fairly busy job with lots of hard deadlines (hence the working yesterday on my planned vacation day AND today on my day off, oh! and next Friday, too), training for various athletic endeavors, participating in volunteer activities, and for the last few months, being pregnant.

I am almost done with school (two weeks!), almost done being pregnant (two months!), and have hired someone to help out with the deadline-oriented stuff at work (she starts Tuesday!). It kills me to not be signed up for any races right now, but I can’t train for anything, really, so it seems silly to waste more money on race fees (if I had all the money I’ve spent on races that I didn’t do because of injuries and/or pregnancy in the last two years, I could buy a lot of very cool stuff). I know that having a baby will bring on a very different kind of busy/stress level, but I’ll be down to only baby & job until I feel comfortable starting a training plan again (half mary in 2012! marathon in 2013!)

BUT, when I don’t have a lot of stuff going on, I become…lazy. I procrastinate. I apparently feel that I need  a high-stress situation to get things done. No matter what my intentions are, if I have time, I leave things to the last minute. I HATE that. I’d rather just do things as they come up & revel in the free-time at the end.

How do other people handle things? Are you a procrastinator? A recovering procrastinator? (If the latter, can you direct me to your 12-step program?) Do you prefer to run at a super high level, a medium level, or a sane level?

How do you manage stress?

And for those of you who are parents working outside the home, how do you deal with work/life/family balance?

(I am not, in any way, trying to start any kind of discussion about parents who go to work at a not-home place, parents who work from home, and parents who are stay-at-home parents without outside income; all have benefits, pitfalls, and are easily judged by others, which I have no intention of doing. Big fan of everyone doing what works best for their particular situation/reality. My situation/reality is that I will be working after my 12-week maternity leave, both out of necessity [yay money!] and because I generally do enjoy my job [just not lately, due to overload]. I work 4 days/week, and the architect is going to a 4-day a week schedule after Alvie is born, too, so that Alvie will only need daycare 3 days/week.)

 

February 2012 Goals

Jan 31st, 2012
by gazelle.
1 comment

Can you believe that today is the last day of January? 2012 is already 1/12 over! This month was not the way I typically like to start the year, and I think you’ll see that the number of stressors in my life negatively impacted my goal achieving for the month. I am okay with that, because if I weren’t okay with that, then I would be more stressed out, and that helps no one.

So – what was I going to do this month?

January 2012 Goals

  1. Find a daycare for Alvie Bean starting in July! – FAIL! But I really do need to get on this ASAP. July is only 5 months away, and I don’t think the cats are going to be adequate caregivers. We’re on a waiting list, but the earliest that would start would be September.
  2. Purchase and install shelves/storage for Alvie Bean’s room. – FAIL! Dammit. But – we got a carseat! And baby laundry detergent. As soon as I have a place to keep the clothes, I will be washing and folding and storing.
  3. Clean out the office and make it more office-y, and less “place where junk goes to die” – FAIL! This is going to have to wait until I’m done w/ school, but since that’s nearly here…
  4. Minimize work/school stress through the gratuitous use of meditation (oops – typed medication the first time; not the same thing), yoga, and other exercise. – FAIL!

January 2012 Training Goals

  1. Fifteen hours of exercise-related activity. – FAIL! I got about 11.5 hours, which all things considered is okay, I guess. Between the pelvic pain and the additional stress in my life, I’m just pleased that I didn’t quit EVERYTHING 3 weeks ago!
  2. A minimum of five yoga classes – SUCCESS!  Finally – something I actually did! I logged 5 yoga classes & 1 home practice. Yay!
  3. Average one swim/week – FAIL! I only swam twice in January. BUT – my last swim was so awesome, and I’m swimming again tomorrow. So, yay?
  4. Average one bike/week – FAIL! I am finding it very difficult to bike at all anymore, so didn’t log any bike time this month. My knees hit my belly. I need to go back to the fitness center and use the recumbent bike again – that seems a little better.
  5. One walk with the architect every weekend – FAIL! See aforementioned pelvic injury.

 

Well – that doesn’t look good, does it?

BUT – I did have some successes that I need to mention.

  1. I got through my big, stressful work project, sanity intact
  2. I survived the month, sanity intact
  3. Ummm…my sanity is still intact?

Honestly – January was not good to me. Between the giant, enormously stressful work project, finishing up grad school, my dad’s cancer diagnosis, the tree falling on the architect’s truck, and oh, yeah – last Saturday night our furnace stopped working (so happy we don’t live in a SUPER cold place), this was a rough month. Add to that being fairly pregnant, and you have a recipe for crazy, I think.

It’s hard for me to gauge how well I handled all this, as I’m not sure how well I should be handling it all. Sometimes I think I’m okay, and sometimes I think that I could really be doing much better. I have decided that since I still feel fairly sane, that maybe I’m either (a) handling it okay, or (b) repressing and on my way to a huge breakdown at some unknown point in the future. Could go either way, I suppose.

 

ANYWAY – onward and upward…if my February goals look familiar, that’s because they are.

February 2012 Goals

  1. Finish grad school! YAY!
  2. Find a daycare for Alvie Bean starting in July!
  3. Purchase and install shelves/storage for Alvie Bean’s room.
  4. Clean out the office and make it more office-y, and less “place where junk goes to die”
  5. Finalize baby prep lists

February 2012 Training Goals

  1. Fifteen hours of exercise-related activity (total tallied below: 15.5 hours)
  2. Six yoga classes, minimum (estimated time: 7.5 hours)
  3. Five swims, minimum (estimated time: 3.75 hours)
  4. Two 15-minute upper body weights sessions/week (estimated time: 2.25 hours)
  5. Four visits to the fitness center for 30 minutes of cardio (estimated time: 2 hours)

I know that the key for me is exercise, and I don’t think this is overly ambitious. However, I do reserve the right to listen to my body and step back if necessary. It’s going to be a busy month. I am 31 weeks pregnant & will end February at 35.5 weeks pregnant. I have no idea what I’ll be able to do by then. I’m hoping that I can continue to move – at least a little – because I know that will make everything go easier.

So (don’t feel compelled to look at this; it’s my own personal crazy) my training plan for February 2012: Feb 2012 Plan

Happy end of the month!

Three (3!) Things Thursday

Jan 19th, 2012
by gazelle.
3 comments

1. Yesterday morning, the architect & I woke up to a very loud noise at about 2 am. We rushed to the window to see what was the matter. Turns out, it wasn’t jolly st. nick & 8 tiny reindeer. It was one of our walnut trees uprooting and falling onto the architect’s pickup. We also were powerless (well, without electricity, anyways) all night, so it was a chilly, dark, and snowy morning! I made it to work about 9:30, and the architect waited at home for PGE to come cut down the tree, since it was leaning on some lines. He waited. And waited. And after the power went on, he plugged in my kick-ass chainsaw and with the help of a couple of neighbors, cut down the biggest parts on his truck. Finally, at about 8 pm or so last night, PGE came and cut down the rest of the tree. Apparently they were a bit busy yesterday!

 

2. I am four weeks away from finishing school! I would be super excited if I wasn’t so stressed out about finishing school! And work! (ha! just kidding, mom – I am not stressed at all. In fact, I am currently floating on a zen cloud made of unicorns.)

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3. I am writing this on Wednesday night (as is my custom), and it’s 11 pm. I haven’t been asleep for almost 21 hours. I hate these periodic insomnia episodes! If I weren’t floating on unicorn clouds, I’m sure it would be stress related. The job is a bit…much right now. Good news – after Friday, the job will go back to normal stress levels, and I’m hoping to sleep for 48 hours straight this weekend. Or at least 10 hours in 2-hour increments.(This is, however, nothing to worry about if you are, by chance, my mother & are just here to see a pic of the architect’s truck. Really – I tell lies on the internet to make myself seem more interesting. I actually sleep like a baby.)

 

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The State of the Amy

Dec 6th, 2010
by gazelle.
1 comment

So – I’m not going to do foot updates anymore. It has officially been 9 weeks since surgery, and three weeks since the boot came off. I’ll probably still mention things from time to time – it’s likely going to be another 4-5 months before the foot is back to normal, but it’s boring to talk about all the time (not for me, though – just boring for you! See – I am always thinking of you.)

So – what’s going on with me?

So  much, gentle readers, so much.

I am, once again, a giant ball of stress. My neck is pretty much sore all the time from the tension I’m holding. My job is ridiculous right now. I’m having trouble holding on to the joy that my countdown timer (see sidebar) usually brings me. BUT – I also don’t want to do anything rash. What I need is some contingency planning.

Also, I find myself over-extended, despite my best efforts.

I have, in order to fix this, canceled every non work or school related activity this week. I have my final project for my class due on Friday, and am not nearly as far along as I would like.

This weekend is CRAZY!  As soon as I finish my school project, I am hopping on a bus & heading to brew review. I don’t care if I get there two hours before everyone else, at this point! Saturday, I am holiday shopping in the morning, then holiday partying in the afternoon. Sunday, more holiday partying (naked santa party, woo!). Monday next, happy hour with school mates, Wednesday: quilt making; Thursday: another happy hour; Friday: the architect’s “Thanks for taking care of me” fancy dinner.”

I know I’ve frequently said I like to stay busy, but I think I should’ve maybe qualified that with a “I like to stay busy AT HOME! AT HOME!”

I am looking forward to each of these events, and don’t want to skip anything, but am not going to add anything new to the calendar between now & the end of the year (unless it’s AWESOME!).

There are some good things happening.

The architect & I took a lovely trip to Astoria over the weekend – our annual anniversary trip. I did some walking (about 1.7 miles on Saturday), and although I was sooooore in the foot by the end of the night, I feel pretty good about that.

Between last week’s swim, 10 minutes of yoga (that left me sore for 2 days), walk & 15 minutes on the trainer (5 minutes more than the last time), I exercised more last week than I did in all of November combined. Go, me!

Tonight, I am swimming, and am hoping to get in another swim on Wednesday – it’s the only exercise that, cardio-fitness aside – I actually feel normal doing. My other goal is to do at least 10 minutes of something each day this week. Both to improve the fitness level AND to try to keep the stress manageable.

I used to do weekly training goals, back when I was training for stuff, but this week, my goals are a little different.

Monday: Swim, then farewell sushi dinner with The Ambitious One (*sniff* she’s leaving me for another job, far, far away!)

Tuesday: 20 minutes on the trainer; complete section one of the big project

Wednesday: Swim; complete section two of the big project

Thursday: 20 minutes on the trainer; complete section three of the project

Friday: 20 minutes yoga; final touches to project; 20 more minutes of yoga; brew review

Saturday: SHOP! PARTY!

Sunday: 1.5 mile walk; naked santa!

I hope that light at the end of the tunnel isn’t a train.

Sep 22nd, 2009
by gazelle.
3 comments

Of the four projects that I have due starting Thursday 9/24 & ending Wednesday 9/30, one is 95% complete. One is 80% complete. the other two are 50% or less, but are the smaller, more familiar projects, and ones that I worry about much, much less.

In other news, there is still wine left in North Portland, so maybe my stress management tools have improved since last January.

In other other news, it’s a damn good thing that there’s going to be a fun party this weekend. Thanks, Emily, for planning your wedding for the very weekend I would need it most! You’re the best!

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